I wouldn’t be my father’s daughter if I didn’t take advantage of a good deal. Once, at a softball tournament, Jack In The Box was having Taco Tuesday so my dad bought two bags. (Side Note: Jack In The Box is a fast food burger joint…which might explain their tacos being priced at a quarter.) Only slightly exaggerating, he’s got a case of motor oil in the shop, a barrel of ranch dressing in the fridge, and a pallet of french cut canned green beans in the spare bathroom downstairs. This weekend I stopped by Kroger for cornmeal. (I was going to a fish fry and wanted to contribute cornbread.) I effortlessly found my ingredient, but no trip to Kroger is complete without sailing over to an exiled island (normally located off the coast of Vitamin) to where even the most well-behaved groceries can be banished. The term “Manager Special” is given to those deeply discounted items which are dented cans, crushed cereal boxes, and discontinued products. They are very “special” indeed. Much to my surprise, I found coffee (Caribou, Copper Moon, and Seattle’s Best) that was discounted to a price below the Kroger brand (I checked.) This made me a happy camper so I bought one of each. The hazelnut flavored sweetener and fuel injector fluid also caught my eye and was too cheap to pass up.
Laugh at us while you can, but we’re going to buy a falcon with the money we saved from buying on sale and in bulk. You’ll run out of food in the dead of winter and our bellies will be full of green bean ranch soup. You’ll think to yourself, “Man this dead of winter is frigid and I would kill for some hot hazelnut java!”
We’ll be sippin’ it… as we change our oil in cars that happen to have the cleanest fuel injectors in town. (Whatever they are.)